ORIENT EXPRESS REPORTS RECORD LOSSES.
The Orient Express today reported record losses after Agatha Christie highlighted the dangers of train travel. Tickets sales have slumped since…….

PROFESSORS’ CRIME WAVE  'CAUSED BY STRESS'
Oxford University announced an internal investigation into levels of staff stress after the number of students murdered by their tutors hit a record high. Inspector Morse of the Oxfordshire Police was unavailable……

Fanciful? Apparently not judging from the endless series of reports investigating the issues raised by The Da Vinci Code. I even heard one trailer asking (I kid you not) 'Is there really an albino monk named Silas?'

The Da Vinci Code, for anyone out there who has not yet read it, is a well constructed, intelligent thriller with a good smattering of Murderous Monks and Important People with Something to Hide. Each conundrum leads seamlessly to the next – puzzles that are difficult enough to keep you guessing but easy enough for you to solve a few pages before the characters themselves, which is very satisfying.

I really enjoyed the novel. But Donowdo can exclusively reveal ….IT’S JUST PRETEND!

Seriously wacky building

I have to admit, though, that without The Da Vinci Code, I probably wouldn’t have visited Rosslyn Chapel because I simply wouldn’t have heard of it. A seriously wacky building in the village of Roslin, seven miles south of Edinburgh, the Rosslyn Chapel may well owe its continuing survival to The Da Vinci Code.  The centuries have not been kind to this small, ornately carved chapel, built for one of the Earls of Orkney in the 15th Century – The stone is crumbling and the building in now covered by a metal awning to keep off the worst of the Scottish weather.

The owners of the chapel have not been slow to exploit the enormous interest caused by the novel, which is, predictably, for sale in the on-site gift shop. The 'guide yourself' panels in the chapel itself present you with all sorts of puzzles – from the hidden symbolism of the Masonic carvings – to the suggestion that one of the carvings shows maize, originating from the Americas, which all goes to prove …… More simple explanations – the carvings show endless repetitions of the family crest and that, as any gardener knows, maize just doesn’t look like that  -are glossed over. But who can blame them? This is a truly wonderful building and the additional tourist revenue can be used to pay for much needed repairs.

The true Boss from Hell

Aside from hidden codes, the Holy Grail and the premature discovery of the New World, I was struck by human side of the chapel – The true story of The Boss from Hell:

Have you ever had that feeling that your boss is an idiot and you could do the job so much better yourself? In the case of the Rosslyn Chapel, this was so. Within the chapel, there is a beautifully carved stone pillar, the work of the master mason. The story goes that he went abroad for a while to get inspiration for more carvings to put around the chapel. In his absence, his apprentice carved a pillar of his own. Unfortunately, this pillar showed far more imagination and flair than the work of the boss. On his return, the master mason was so enraged at being shown up by an underling that he murdered him! The chapel also has the carved heads of the evil boss, the apprentice and his grieving mother.

A visit to Rosslyn Chapel, with pleasant pub lunch, available in Roslin village, and a wander down to the skeletal remains of the old castle can while away a not too strenuous afternoon. On the other hand, if you really fancy drinking up the atmosphere, both Roslin Castle and College House, adjacent to the chapel, are available to rent from the Landmark Trust.

The soundtrack and Dan Brown's novel The Da Vinci Code are available to buy from Amazon.co.uk, as are his other novels.